Most of the time I don’t use this site to write openly about what’s going on in celebrities’ lives specifically. I tend to use popular stories to address the broader issues challenging our generation. I’m not really interested in the fabulous lives of the rich and famous because, well, I sip tea and mind my business. But today… I’m making an exception.
So, if you don’t know who the heck Ciara, Russell Wilson or the rap star known as Future is, here’s a quick overview: Ciara was engaged to Percocet-popping rapper Future (who is the father of a number of children by different women — yes, I have given CiCi a serious side-eye for even mixing herself in with that mess). During that time, Ciara became pregnant with Future’s child. They were well on their way towards marital heaven even going so far as publicly sporting matching blonde dreadlocks. *sighs*. Somewhere between accepting his other 3 baby mommas and becoming his 4th, Ciara couldn’t take it anymore. Future was irresponsible, unfaithful and unwilling to give up drugs for his family. Lawd, hammercy. But because we serve a promptly God, Ciara carried on. She gave birth to baby Future, released some pretty good music and whipped herself back into killer shape all with NFL quarterback, Russell Wilson, by her side. *three snaps in a circle*. Much to the dismay of Future, Ciara was happy and prospering. She had her baby and her man who loved her regardless of the bad decisions she’d made in love (she also dated 50 Cent and Bow Wow at one point. She has a testimony). The controversy really started when Ciara was spotted with her new man with baby Future in tow. Some people contested that it was too soon for the child to be around a man she was dating. Although, none of us knew how long she and Russell had been seeing each other, the popular opinion was that it was not long enough to introduce him to her child.
And just like that, all the deadbeat dads and desperate women came together to attack Ciara. Along with, guess who, Future himself. Via Twitter and the media, Father Future expressed his shame in his ex-fiancee with TMI about their dating/sex life. As any true gentleman would.
Meanwhile, Russell Wilson married her. Devoted his life to her and her son. Publicly complimented her mothering skills and her womanhood whenever possible. And continues to do so to this day. But the haters have not let up. Whenever Russell does anything to honor his WIFE you all have the nerve to jump on social media and call him corny OR you make comments about how sad Ciara must be for “settling” with Russell. Are. Y’all. DRUNK? Seriously. You honestly think the Princess of Crunk&B is drowning herself in her codeine tears for Future while her millionaire husband lavishes her, and her children, with love and affection? You think a man who shows nothing but respect and admiration for the woman he’s spending the rest of his life with is corny?! Who raised y’all? Let me guess. Men who believe that a woman only needs to be provided for and not emotionally protected. Women who are too scared to ask for what they deserve because any man is better than no man at all. TV shows that promote the idea that the only test of a woman is in her ability to endure various forms of abuse because her true value rests in her ability to forgive and forget. A whole generation that praises dysfunction over wholeness because it’s more fun to talk about in your group chat.
Nah, I’ll pass.
If a loving marriage committed to a man who recognizes and admires your goodness means you’ve settled in life…then, I look forward to settling. If having a man who’s willing to love your children as his own means you’re married to a “cornball” then show me where to find one, baby. Don’t let these post-millennial “real men” make you second guess what you know is right. And don’t let dysfunction become a regular part of your life because you don’t think what you deserve is out there waiting for you. I don’t care what Keyshia Kaoir says, do you hear me? You do not owe a man your best years in exchange for his measly last name. There is nothing charming about crying yourself to sleep, driving by to see who’s at his house or having your chest tighten each time a good looking woman walks by because your man has a wandering eye. Put peace, mutual respect and monogamy (if that’s what you want!) over drama—watch how the universe comes together to work in your favor. Refuse to give into the fear of loneliness so much that you accept any ol’ thing. Not all the great fairytales have a tragedy. Sometimes the Prince is just…a prince.